Long time readers will be more than aware I don’t tolerate crap very well. It’s jut not in me to slog through a lame game for hours at a time. I’ve got better stuff to do, like watch paint dry, pick my toes, or point and laugh at people.

This week I played a game for the Wii, Sky Crawlers; Innocent Aces. As you are well aware, I’m a big fan of the Wii and it’s motion capture system and that I continue to be let down by the cavalcade of crap that has sluiced out from the developers for the Wii. This game is no different.

It’s supposed to be a flight sim for the Wii based on a reasonably obscure anime Sky Crawlers, which was in turn based on a more obscure book, Sky Crawlers. I assume the “story” of the game follows the same story for the book and the anime- genetically modified humans fight to the death in aerial combat or “dog fights” for the entertainment of the masses, only to be reborn and forced to do it all over again.

I say assume because the crap controls, poor graphics, and utter cheese-ballness of the characters forced me to quit playing after about 15 minutes. Frankly, I just couldn’t do it anymore. So, instead I played a different game, Space Paranoids.

Now, I know what you’re thinking, “Abraxas, you don’t find the use of genetically modified teenagers in death entertainment spectacles timely and relevan…wait, you said Space Paranoids.”

Yes, I did. Space Paranoids.

Of course I know what you’re thinking now, “Abraxas, you can’t have been playing Space Paranoids. Space Paranoids is a fictional game from the movie, Tron. It’s one of the games that Dillinger stole from Flynn and used to fuel his rise to CEO. Flynn had to play those games when he was in the computer world.”

Yes, it’s that Space Paranoids. The one from Tron. And I was playing it.

Now, you’re wondering how that came about. Several important factors are in play here but the only one that you need to know is- I got the hook-ups, yo. For the Home Schools or those who think Attack of the Clones is cool, Tron was a ground-breaking movie from back in the day about a guy who gets sucked into the computer world (the internets before it was known by that name) and he has to fight is way out, playing the very video games he created.

Yeah, it’s freaking cool. The game itself is simple. Point and click to fire, and WASD to move. Oh, yeah, it’s played on a PC with a keyboard and mouse combination. I probably should have mentioned that.

Anyway.

The game is simple. Easy controls. You pilot a tank, just like the one Clu drove in the beginning of the movie, and you drive around shooting Recognizers. Yes, the Recognizers from the movie.

There isn’t’ a story, unless you want to make one up while you’re playing ( I did). If you beat the game, there are secrets to unlock. I won’t reveal them here but I will say the secrets involve the words “never before seen”, “Tron 2”, and “Stills”.

There are a lot of reasons why I found Space Paranoids to be infinitely more interesting than Sky Crawlers. One of them being the meta-levels of game play involved. Space Paranoids is a fictional game from a movie, it was played in the “real” world and in the “computer” world. Playing it in the really real world adds a level to the movie and the game. In a sense, I am participating in the movie itself. Flynn played Space Paranoids, and now I am playing that game.

That really appeals to me both as a movie goer and a game player. Also, games and movies have a poor history together. Typically video games based on movies are buggy (Iron Man), lame ( the original movie tie-in, ET), or really against the premise of the movie (Fight Club).

Space Paranoids sidesteps these issues by being simple, fun, and getting the idea. The original movie was set in the golden age of video gaming, the late 70’s and early 80’s. Think Space Invaders or Pac-man. Simple graphics and simple controls.

Space Paranoids stays true to that era- you’re a tank and they’re Recognizers. They are trying to land on your head. You need to shoot them to stop that. Go.

Like I said, simple game play that allows the player to create and add their own levels of fun working in concert with a movie world that invites fantasy and involvement. For the Home Schooled- it’s an easy game to pick up and play, and it reminds me of a movie I saw as a kid.

Now, I know what you’re thinking, “Abraxas, can I play Space Paranoids too?”

Normally on these kind of hook-ups I’d have to say no. I got my street cred to protect, but this time around it’s different. You too can play Space Paranoids.

Go to http://www.spaceparanoidsonline.com/ and install the browser extension. Once that is done you can play to your heart’s content, and try to beat FLN’s high score. I am.

If you’ve never seen the original Tron, I recommend it. By today’s editing standards it will be a little slow, and the special effects are incredibly dated. But it’s still a lot of fun.

And avoid Sky Crawlers: Innocent Aces as a game. I’m sure the novel is much better. If you can read the untranslated Japanese anyway.